Monday, November 20, 2006

Jayden James Federline "Grossed Out" After Viewing His Own Conception On Video

Hollywood, CA--Britney Spears' eldest son Jayden James was "visibly shaken" after sitting through nearly four hours of unedited video footage of his parents "doing it" in various rooms of their Malibu mansion.

Ms. Spears, who has threatened to give away a remastered version of the infamous "four hour sex tape" that her ex-husband Kevin Federline keeps claiming to possess, thought nothing of bringing along young Jayden James to the editing suite to watch a rough cut of the film last weekend.

"I mean, it is one thing to accidentally walk in on your parents having sex," stated Jayden James, "but being forced to endure four straight hours of it on a 60" Hi-Definition Plasma screen can really mess with your mind."

"In addition, though I am only one, even I can add nine months to the January '05 date imprinted on the video and deduce that I am probably watching the actual night I was conceived up there on the screen," added Jayden James.

"My mom better start putting away some cash to pay for the years of future therapy I'm gonna need to get over seeing that!"

The elder Mr. Federline was unable to comment on this latest episode of Ms. Spears' blatant disregard for the welfare of their children, as he was busy giving a concert for 10,000 empty folding chairs at Cobo Arena in Detroit.

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