Memo From The President

From the desk of George W. Bush--January 1st, 2007

Good morning, my fellow Americans. As we begin a new year here in America, I think it is always wise and smart to reflect back upon the year that we just lived through, to remember the things we shouldn't forget.

For me, it was a year to be proud of. I think we made great progress in Iraq, and I can safely say now that we are somewhat closer to getting on the road that may someday lead us to a free and democratic Iraq.

Of course, one of the most important deals that went down last year in 2006 was the execution and subsequent death of Saddam Hussein. Hard to believe it has been a full year since we hung the bastard; it seems like it was only yesterday.

Now that I have had some time to process and regurgitate on the matter, I have to admit that I do kind of miss the old guy. Sure, he was a pain in the ass, and he did kill all those Kruds. Or, was it the Shits? Well, no matter, they are all gone now, and so is he.

Granted, we never found any of those weapons of mass destruction that he hid so well on us. And he did keep his composure 'til the very end, claiming that he was still the President of Iraq. Hell, I guess I would do the same thing myself if it came down to it!

Except, of course, I would need to say that I was President of the United States of America.

In any case, 2007 will be a brand new year for all of us. A year that we have never lived in. A year without Saddam, and James Brown, for that matter. And as my old friend Jim used to say, "Pappa's got a brand new bag, and he's puttin' it right over Saddam's head!"

Heh heh. I guess he didn't say all that. Anyway, Happy New Year everybody. Now let's get out there and do whatever it is we Americans do all year that makes us the great nation that I know we are.